--*What's On TV Tonight, November 21

2 CBS
Survivor: the Andean Mountain Uruguayan Soccer Team Challenge

4 NBC
Tina Fey delivers another awesomely written episode of 30 Rock that you won't watch because you'd rather see Ray J drink champagne off the nude body of a developmentally disabled cocktail waitress.

5 E! Entertainment
Slowing Down For the Kardashians

6 ABC
From the Nokia Theater, the American Music Awards featuring Taylor Swift. Swift and Kanye West perform a unity medley of Elmo's greatest self-esteem songs.

6 ABC
On Oprah, porn star Jenna Jameson shows she doesn't know the difference between good attention and bad attention.

7 PBS
Frontline examines how medical marijuana is now being prescribed for glaucoma, hyperactivity in children, anal expulsive personality disorder, low self esteem and poverty.

7 CNN
Lou Dobbs puts up a fence in his own back yard and declares his own house free of Mexicans, at least the ones he's not married to.

7 CNN
On Larry King, former Miss California USA Carrie Prejean continues to show that she doesn't know the difference between good attention and bad attention.

9 The History Channel
Catherine the Great is remembered for also being a great lover of animals. A really great lover.

10 MTV
If The Hills were really unscripted, somebody certainly would have killed somebody else by now.

11 CW
Gossip Girl: OMFG! A 3some! WTF? LOL!

11 CW
Gossip Girl: Oh no! ABRT!

11 CW
Two Gossip Girls, One Cup

11 CW
Gossip Girl does not know the difference between good attention and bad attention.

11 CW
Gossip Girl: Hey, did anybody notice that the "threesome" entry on Wikipedia has completely gratuitous threesome pictures? A little off topic, but hey, I'm just sayin' ...

12 Fox News
Glenn Beck doesn't know the difference between good attention and bad attention. Yet that lack of self-awareness is refreshing, and has allowed us all to relax a bit and once again feel OK enjoying manifestly racist invective. Thanks, Glenn!

13 AMC
After watching Mad Men's Don Draper drink, womanize and verbally and physically abuse people, do any of us remember why we ever liked him in the first place?

14 Fox News
After watching Sarah Palin lie, back stab, quit her job, pander to idiots, mangle language, manipulate her family, infight with co-workers, exhibit total ignorance about global affairs and exploit her looks to cover up her lack of substance, do any of us wonder why she's not starring on AMC's Mad Men yet?

14 Fox News
Sarah Palin doesn't know the difference between good attention and bad attention. Or that Africa isn't a country.

15 HBO
Boogie Nights, a rip-off of Martin Scorsese movies with no ending

15 HBO
Magnolia, a rip-off of Robert Altman movies with no ending

15 HBO
There Will Be Blood, a rip-off of Stanley Kubrick movies with no ending.

15 HBO
The Dukes of Hazzard, a rip-off of the William Shakespeare classic, A Midsummer Night's Dream.

15 HBO
The Muppet Movie, a retelling of the legend of Galahad, in which a knight of pure heart in the form of a frog seeks the cup of glory, a frog who embodies a code of chivalry and romance that none of his peers can match and which engenders in him a contempt of the world and it of him, his unworldliness both holy but also cold and tragic.

16 Cinemax
Fellating For Godot

17 HGTV
Martha Stewart Presents: How To Throw A Family Fight That Tastes Like Christmas

18 We
We is the channel that celebrates women. Next up, a bunch of catfighting, money grubbing bitches from Great Neck going through the Change.

--*Man Angry at Kanye West Recants After Actually Hearing Taylor Swift Song

Crawfordsville, Indiana (API) Sammy McBrayer was sitting at home last week watching YouTube when he came across a video people had been talking about at work: A clip of Kanye West at the MTV Video Music Awards jumping up in the middle of Taylor Swift’s acceptance speech for Best Female Video award and insisting that artist Beyonce Knowles deserved it instead.

“I just went ballistic,” he said. “How dare this guy who wasn’t even involved jump in and steal this woman’s moment of glory? I thought somebody ought to give him such a smack.”

But then, McBrayer said, “I looked up Taylor Swift’s song book. Now I’ve got to turn down my sanctimony a few notches. I think Kanye might have been onto something.”

And after spending a few hours delving into Swift’s career, McBrayer says he really had to put everything in a new context.

“[Swift's music] really blows. I mean it’s really a bunch of s***,” McBrayer said. “And supposedly she sings country music? Who did the calculus on that? Doesn’t sound much different than any of the crap my 13-year-old daughter listens to. You know the thing about 13-year-olds is that they turn 14 eventually.”

McBrayer says that though he still thinks West’s move was rude, “sometimes you have to be rude to do the right thing.”

“I realize now what Kanye was doing. Sometimes a brave person has to jump in the vortex–throw himself bodily into the crossfire to protect people like me from trifling mediocrity, the stuff that kills us from within … every day.”

McBrayer asked a bunch of people to come to his house to talk about their feelings later that night, and the group soon turned into an angry mob.

“Maybe we could go to her house and remove the award from her hands by force,” said a female neighbor who asked to remain anonymous.

“Yeah,” said another. “Or maybe we could invite Kanye to our town and tell him how sorry we are that we were all so nasty to him on the Internet.”

The crowd grew unruly, and McBrayer thought it might even spill into the streets.

Few of those gathered even suggested that they were big fans of Kanye West’s music, though they conceded that at least it was original, unlike the preconceived, glozed and corporate manufactured fluff that Swift was making to pander to kids and dummies.

“You can’t help but admire him,” said McBrayer. “Even if you don’t like his stuff, you’ve got to admire it. It’s innovative and rough in the right ways. He’s an artist, and meanwhile you’ve got this little piece of jailbait dancing around in her pajamas trying to render us helpless and stun us into mute stupidity with her poison electric stinger. Why are we taking her side on this?”

Though earlier in the week president Barack Obama had entered the fray by calling West a “jackass,” many of his advisors hoped that soon the president would recant and give West a medal of some sort.

“I just feel so bad,” said McBrayer. “I mean, I know that Kanye West doesn’t know me from Adam, but I was saying so many nasty things to him in my head, and it’s just bad karma because now I know he was doing it for me. I was so wrong. I was so very very wrong.”

The crowd departed with no immediate plans to take action.

As another neighbor of McBrayer’s said, “We’ve got to let it go. After all, Kanye will probably do something else that’s dumb at another awards show sooner or later. He can’t seem to help it. We weren’t right to be angry this time. But I guess he’ll earn it back somehow.”

--*What Surprising Things Have We Learned About the Economy?

--*Inflation might be higher than reported because the reporting agencies keep it artificially low.

--*The personal savings rate going forward might not be enough to re-energize economic growth.

--*Kanye West is an obnoxious bully who must compensate for low self-esteem in childhood by constantly feeling out and redefining his own ego boundaries without any sort of inhibiting social force to stop him.  Given his lack of self-understanding and the sense of powerlessness he likely feels, the gold paraphernalia he wears is of little real value.

--*According to the "efficient market hypothesis," the market as a whole understands the true value of things because of constant adjustments, value that individuals alone may or may not understand. In other words, the market has developed cognitive thought and will rise from the murky depths like Godzilla and crush you.

--*But really, if the market always knew best, then tell me: Why in the hell are the Jonas Brothers still popular?

--*Too much government intervention hurts the economy. This is said with much conviction these days by people who live in trailers.

--*Supply side economic advocates say that increased private sector investment creates extra supply that foments its own demand. Keynesian economists, on the other hand, say that increased governmental spending on infrastructure causes a cascade of spending and growth in the economy. Either way, it tends to help Steven Spielberg.

--*People during fashion week look totally "money" as Vince Vaughn said in Swingers.

--*People who adhere with ideological purity to their small government beliefs will destroy the economy, the government, you, me and themselves before they ever let that particular conviction of theirs die--and thus let the intellectual insecurity behind it stand naked.

--*The market is efficient and people know everything they need to know to make an informed decision. Except, of course, Bernie Madoff's clients. Boy, did those guys ever get fucked in the ass!